Thursday 18 July 2013

Testimony

Here's one happy reader.




I recently received a message from one of my readers and she thoroughly captured the essence of what Miss Conception is all about. Let me use this platform to say:


Thank you Doriss, I'm happy I was able to highlight an aspect of your vision. Your words remain in a special place in my heart.


I'll let her words do the "talking"....


Enjoy...


"I need the continuation please. Oh my God, the book
literally sucked me into it. I couldn't put it down.
 
I read it in less than 5 days. What turned out as my book
for travelling only, ended up as for bed time too.
 

Does Dylan exist somewhere? I can marry him now.
He & Nicole stole my love life. True love does exist no
matter the trials & if it's meant to be, nothing can stop it
-as you made it real in these two.

Nic, AJ & Coco really make me admire the girlfriends
I have & treasure them even more now.

So much transpired that I'm eternally grateful I bought your book.
The lessons I saw in your characters are true passion of
love &, friendship.....
 

...Your book exceeded my expectations. I have narrated it all ...
 

...Last night I had to finish the last three chapters as
I just wanted more & more and couldn't stop reading.

To be honest, I was not looking forward to it's ending.
 

Beautiful piece of work. I laughed through it. Your characters
were very entertaining too.
 

Loved every bit. Simply awesome. A masterpiece.
 

Thanks so much. I can go on & on & on......but all in all...CLASSIC!
 

Love you
Doriss



I'm very interested to know your thoughts on Miss Conception. I enjoyed writing it and I'm happy to see that my readers enjoyed reading it.
Don't be left out. Make Miss Conception essential in your summer reading collection. 



xoxo...




Monday 17 June 2013

Embarrassing Moments.

Flying Crisps.


If you're thinking "Flying Crisps????" What is she on about this time; I invite you to read on, and probably by the end you'll cross out my name and put in yours instead.


Enjoy...


I kid you not; this is a real life story that happened to “a friend of mine”…
 
 
Ok, I admit it, it was me:-(
 
 
I had just come out of a class and was perched on a cold metal seat in Waterloo Underground station, munching on a greasy packet of Walkers crisps; man was I hungry. About halfway through my ready salted lovelies, my train arrived.
 
I got into the carriage, and seated right in front of me was a specimen of male gorgeousness, so I immediately discarded the semi-empty packet of crisps, which I had almost been tempted to tip into my mouth for the last few crumbs of my 50pence.
 
I had to look good and well-presented in front of this guy. Vegetable-oil flavoured lip gloss was definitely not in vogue. So I began fiddling with my phone and acting like I was busy, whilst sneaking cheeky peeks from my lowered lashes.
 
 
Just before my designated stop, a thought came to mind and in order not to lose it, I started tapping away at my phone. I honestly didn’t realize the minute the train jerked to a halt. And in pure out-of-body fashion, I saw my phone slipping from my hands in one direction and my body flying into the lady in the other direction.
 
Talk about embarrassing moments?
 
Needless to say I picked up my phone, gathered my pride and marched out of the train, head held very high.
 
Maybe if I had just popped the crumbs into my mouth I wouldn’t have noticed or cared if the dude was there or not.
 
Or maybe, just maybe those last few shavings of my 50pence purchase would have given me the required amount of energy to steady myself, in the face of such a forceful halt.
 
 
 
Although upon reflection, the so-called "specimen of gorgeousness" had neither stood up to let me have a seat, nor had he even attempted to break my fall. (Eyes rolling in disgust).
 
 
So please if anyone finds a dejected looking packet of walkers please page me, cos I've got some unfinished business to complete.
 
 
Phew!! I feel a lot lighter, now that I’ve shared that with the world.

 
xoxo...




Tuesday 27 November 2012

Daniel

IPhone 10 Retro.


Tis the season to be jolly, and so I feel a need to share with you; my wonderful readers a short plot that played in the movie screen of my mind recently.


Enjoy...



I'd waited 5 hours in the queue outside the Apple store on Regent's Street. Through the biting winter cold; I'd even wrestled the “not-too-sharp” guy who had tried to cut-in the line of eagerly waiting customers.

You would have thought that the second coming of Christ was the event we all eagerly anticipated. But oh no, it was the IPhone 10 Retro which was being unveiled in 3 hours. Yep you heard right, another 3 hours!!! But somehow without having to trade-in a lung or kidney I managed to get my hands on the latest beauty. There goes my quarterly bonus. The gadget was my gift to my darling Daniel for his 30th birthday. I planned to present it to him at the surprise party I had organized. After all, my sweetheart was worth every penny.

Or so I thought...



There was nothing anyone could say that would turn my mind away from Daniel. Every word he spoke sounded like a host of angels playing a melodic tune. I was smitten, and I didn’t care about any other living being as much as I did for Daniel.


We'd been dating for almost 4 years and last Friday he mentioned how he needed to spoil me, treat me and look after me. I mean which lady wouldn't love to hear those words from her love. He was coming at 7 tonight to take me out to dinner. 

  
Buying my boyfriend an IPhone 10 Retro wasn’t the first sacrifice I had made in my time… If gifts could prove a person’s love for someone, then feel free to call me Maestro.




But tonight was special and I'd bought a new dress for our date at 7. I even splashed out, and had my weave restyled. This was it; I just needed to wait till he arrived. I looked around my immaculately decorated living room to ensure I hadn't forgotten anything;

Butterflies in tummy: check
Nerves: check
Excitement: double check
New moisturizing lotion for fourth finger left hand: check! check! check!



We got a nice table at Pablo's. The restaurant was a bit full, and I couldn't help but giggle inwardly as I looked into the faces of my prospective audience.

He held out my chair once the waiter had taken out coats. We ordered starters, and I was careful not to order anything messy. Not that I’m a klutz or anything; it’s just that now wasn’t the best time for spinach to be fastened tight against my pearly whites. I needed to be 100% ‘with-it’… Daniel looked up and I was lost in his beautiful eyes. He cleared his throat and reached for my hands across the table.


"Bianca baby, my love we've been together now for almost 4 years and I think the time is right for us to take that next step…” he paused for a moment.


My heart skipped a beat and I couldn’t hold back the prodigal tears that started to congregate on my lower lid. Daniel withdrew one of his hands and reached into his pocket to pull out a little box. Everywhere went quiet… I couldn’t breathe.... Time stood still and at that very minute only Daniel and I existed. Was this how my best friend Mary, had felt when Jason proposed last year; or my three colleagues at work in the last 3 months; or my sister last April?


Wait a minute!!! Why wasn’t my prospective audience’ attention on me right now? Why wasn’t my charming gentleman of a boyfriend dropping to his knee to complete his speech? Was that really a box he pulled out of his jacket? Were we really at Pablo’s right now?




I dropped my purse on the bedside table before planking out on my bed. The borrowed butterflies had been returned to the store; the nerves were on strike and the excitement from earlier on had vanished. I was too numb to speak or cry. I was blank.

I sat up, retrieved my house keys from the table, looked at them and without thinking flung them across the room in anger. The next think I heard was the shattering of glass into a gazillion pieces as a framed photo of my ex; Daniel and I fell to the floor.

Great!!! Just what I need, another opportunity to sweep 4 years up and throw it in the bin.


If I had wanted a new set of keys I was more than capable of cutting my own damn keys. Daniel’s version of looking after me was for me to move in with him…

So no; he didn’t need to drop on one knee, nor had he pulled out a box with a rock in it. No; he’d pulled out old spare keys to his apartment...



 
I apologise if I've just exposed someone or if you were on your way to "that special dinner @ 7"; please still go ahead. Whilst Daniel does represent x% of guys out there, it doesn't mean your man is in that league.


Somehow I feel a need to stick up for the good guys. So I dedicate this post to all my upstanding citizens of the male gender; all my male cousins, my brother-in-law, husbands to all my close friends and cousins, and even my work colleagues.

Meeting all of you has proved that good men still exist. So to my girlfriend who's still sitting in the taxi right now on your way to "that special date @ 7", ride on, cos your Daniel may just be pulling out a Tiffany box from his coat pocket...

xoxo...

  


Tuesday 23 October 2012

Chapter 2

Misconceptions and mind decay.


The mind is a powerful tool. When used constructively it could easily place you in Thomas Edison's league of inventors. However, when used foolishly the mind could cause your mouth to eject words that make you sound like a total idiot.

Take Chris for instance in Chapter 28;

‘Hey Nicole, busy week?’ Chris asked, settling into the chair opposite mine.

‘Yep, but I sure am looking forward to the weekend.’ I replied.

‘Have you got anything interesting lined up? You know, a bit of shopping, a quick flick?’ he asked.

‘Not this weekend. I’m going to be boring and spend the whole weekend in bed.’ I replied.

‘Come on now, that’s not boring if there’s someone in there with you.’ He said smugly; popping some mints into his mouth, to mask the strong smell of tobacco on his breath.

What a full blown pervert, if I ever did see one. I can’t believe he just uttered those words. I could smell the sweet whiff of dollar bills from a sexual harassment suit…



Why is it that as soon as a young lady steadily climbing the social ladder and thriving in the business world mentions the word, "bed", it's immediately associated with sex and not the God-granted rest that we're all entitled to?

Bare in mind that Miss Conception is pure fiction, but I found myself reliving that same chapter when I stepped into a taxi on my way to the train station.

The taxi driver who was quite rude from the minute I settled my perfect behind in his cab, immediately made it clear that if I intended spending the weekend in London, then I had plans to "rave till my bladder exploded with highly intoxicating substances". Aka go out clubbing till I'm drunk.

Now, I'm not angry at little errors such as people thinking I'm my nephew's mum when I'm with him, cos who wouldn't want to be the mother to such a cutie!

I was at a wedding a while back and during the reception no one from the opposite gender approached me till I picked up my goddaughter, and then out of the blue the logs fell with a bang out of this "gentleman's" eyes and he came over to "talk" to me.... I'll leave you all to draw your own conclusions. I actually found it quite amusing. Maybe "young mum" is a new fragrance sought after by all.

I'm also not angry when people think I'm half my age. Ok ok, maybe not half but at least 5 years younger. Trust me I still get asked for identification when buying vanilla essence in the supermarket. Talk about being strict!

So no, I'm not referring to innocent mistakes, I'm focusing on incorrect views and opinions based on faulty thinking or understanding.

To all my YHPL (Young & Highly Professional Ladies), I invite you to share your experiences of people's misconceptions about you. There is no guarantee that your offerings would lead to the invention of the iLight Bulb, but it sure will provide you the perfect avenue to have a good ol' whinge. :-)
  


TTFN...

  


Wednesday 10 October 2012

Chapter 1

Dylan Carter Exists.


...How many years has it been, since I last had a man? Two thousand and too many: that’s how long.

I’m so sure that all my Christmas wish lists have started and ended with the phrase; “Find me a decent man.”

But to give Santa a break, maybe his ERP system had crashed, and now the elves were suddenly fulfilling their long backlog of requests.

Who knows, I’ll probably be getting another boyfriend as a birthday present next month. Yippee!! I can hardly hide my excitement.

Now I don’t really care about the trail on my face as long as train tracks, as the heavy drops of tears gather to form a mini swimming pool on the elevator floor...

I am now officially confused...


It's quite funny how most ladies, who are single can't stop talking about their need to find a partner with the potential of him becoming "the one". On the other hand, I've heard several married women claim that single ladies are lucky to have their freedom without answering to any man.

I'll put up my hand to say that I've gone from being the leader of the "female singles movement", to being an individual, with a heart ready to love and be loved. So my question is this: "On whose side is the grass greener?" To be single or not to be single that is the ultimate question. What do you think?

Someone once said that she would rather have 5 men trying to get her attention than none at all. I find that I disagree with this mentality, because men are not shoes that you can easily walk into Dune, try on 10 pairs and select 2, with the option of getting a refund within 28 days.

If you are interested; the fact is that Dylan Carter does exist, and he's good-looking too. So stop praying for a million guys to chase after you, because when Santa's ERP system gets a reboot, you'll end up confused. 

Set your sights on one guy and one guy alone, with those characteristics that are in line with your principles and values, and go for it. Wouldn't you rather have a pair of comfortable shoes that you can wear with that priceless piece in your wardrobe, than a dozen shoes that don't coordinate and make your ankles ache?


Feel free to challenge...



A Little Teaser.

Excerpt from Miss Conception by Kika Neri.


There was an emergency and Dr McGuire needed my assistance with a delivery. Luckily the hospital was less than half an hour’s drive from the venue, and I could be there in the next 20 minutes if traffic was favourable. I quickly pulled Mark aside, apologized for the inconvenience and left.

By twenty past midnight I was at the hospital.


After scrubbing up, and with gloves in hand, I walked into the delivery room, and stopped dead in my tracks…


She looked the same, apart from her huge middle, and the fact that her hair seemed shorter and slightly tousled from all the tossing and turning, due to the discomfort of being hugely pregnant:

Pregnant?

She couldn’t be pregnant. How? When? Why?

I still couldn’t believe it, until Susan McGuire handed me her flipchart. There it was in black and white: N. Thompson. But who was the guy beside her? Her boyfriend?

There was no time for daydreaming or questions. I had to channel my thoughts to the patient on the bed.

All I could see now in front of me was ‘a very pregnant lady about to explode’, so the doctor in me went straight to work. It was definitely going to be a long night...


Come back for more...

 



Thursday 4 October 2012

Prologue

Welcome to Kika's Blog!!!!


Now as a newbie, I'll try not to be naive and reveal details such as my pin number, NI number and so on. I will however try to share with you, a piece of my mindset so you can understand the inspiration behind my debut novel; Miss Conception.

Big thanks to all those who've purchased a copy. If you have your copy on you, whether electronic or paperback wave it in the air right now.... (except those who are out on the streets, please keep your kindles and e-book readers out of sight so you don't attract pick-pockets).


It's officially been a year since my bunch of scripts went public and I still feel like people are holding a piece of me in their hands. I often get asked questions like, "...so are you the main character; Nicole?" or "Please where can I find my own Dylan." I've even heard someone say they were in love with AJ.

If you're asking questions like "who the heck are Nicole, Dylan and AJ?", then you obviously don't have a copy yet. (follow the links below and join in, so you don't get lost)

I find it very amusing how people ask questions like; "...so when is the next book coming out?" or "..do you have more than one novel in you?" Truth be told we all have something to say, its just up to the individual as to how they choose to express their thoughts. And to answer your question; yes I have thousands of novels inside me, so watch this space.



I'll get into more details behind Miss C in future posts, but for now I'd like to say a big thank you to all my family members and family friends who've supported me from the day I was born to date. I love you, God bless you real good.

To my dad; I believe the minute you went on that long holiday a switch clicked inside me and Miss Conception came alive.  


Happy Reading...